Life at 79: An interview with Joan Stommen
Interview #1: Aging With Grace + Grit
This is the first in the Aging With Grace + Grit interview series. Joan is a subscriber to AG + G. We met right here in the Substack world. I find her lifestyle of “Active Aging” inspiring and hope you do too! Joan writes at
Name: Joan Stommen
How old are you? 79
Do you identify as another age on the inside? If so, what age + why?
Absolutely! About 60ish most days. Because I’m always active, have younger friends, love learning and trying new things. Just growing along, but I act and appear younger. It’s a mind set I grew up with; my parents were very youthful well into their eighties.
If you just met me, what would you tell me about yourself in just a few sentences?
I’m a Pollyanna! My positive, cheerfulness can be annoying I’ve been told. I substitute in the local elem schools, play in a Pickleball league, teach a Matter of Balance class in preventing falls at the senior center. I’m doing the 1000 hours outside challenge (aiming for 500 this year!)
Are you working? If so, what do you do? If not, when did you retire + do you miss it?
I retired in 2007 around age 64 when my daughter had twins. I was a teacher and principal for 33 years. She needed me full time for awhile. Then I went back to classrooms to substitute. It’s enough a few days a week.
Can you share a surprise or unexpected positive experience you’ve encountered as you’ve aged?
Unexpected loss of my husband as I turned 70. Moving a few times, growing stronger mentally and emotionally, becoming more independent and sure of myself. Becoming close with his best friend, best man ( also a widow) has been a positive experience these past ten years. Traveling by myself to Australia where I’ve more family; adventures with each grandkid @age 12. It was huge for me; planning and doing things I never imagined.
Have you discovered any new passions or hobbies in your later years that surprised you?
Yes. 5ks, paddleboarding and Pickleball after retiring. I’ve always done dance and yoga, skating etcc…but most recently I’m really into Pickleball! I’m good at gathering folks and planning events. Applied and was accepted to Advisory Board of Senior Center. Started working with local authors to find them gigs to read, sell, sign. A Cheerleader, not an author myself.
In what ways have your relationships with family and friends evolved as you’ve aged?
My son and daughter freaked out at the word ‘elderly’ during the pandemic as I fell in that category. I did all the wise things and stayed healthy. They see me as younger too. I’m fit and busy. And while they work, are only in early 50s, I bug them to start now for active aging!
Have you experienced any surprises in terms of personal achievements or milestones in your later years?
The advisory board. Helping authors, volunteering with grief support groups. Surprised myself going for these things…finding out I’m more than a teacher and writer. Also love that my grown grandkids text and share with me on IG They still think I’m fun! Lol
How do you stay mentally and physically active to embrace the surprises that come with aging?
Moving and being outside are the best! I have only one working kidney, bone on bone arthritis in my knees and shoulder. Watch the salt, physical therapy for aches and pain but no meds except for BP. Just keep going, moving, not sit too much! Some peers slow down, take lots of meds, don’t want to ride horses or hike or travel too far. I respect that, but I’m still eager to keep doing and being involved, drive blue highways etc while I still can. I listen to my body, some days it’s just reading and writing, like today. I will play harder tomorrow 😊
What advice would you give to somebody who is 10 years younger than you?
Be active! Sooner you start, the better your later years will be! Less stress/more peace with yoga. Don’t fret about a number. Exercise and sports as we grow along are great equalizers. My PB pals range from 50-90 years old- mostly we can never tell. The Willie Nelson song- “Don’t Let the Old Man In” is inspiring. I put a sticky on my fridge “Don’t Let the Old Woman In” to remind me not to moan or think it’s hard when bending over, getting up and down from the floor; not think about growing older.
Kathi, what a wonderful read! Joan is truly inspiring, I want to be like her when I’m 79!
I’m promoting in IG stories with direct links! Let’s see if it works!